STRESS

I love to cook.  Although some of my friends are quite frank about how awesome and terrific they can cook (Hazel), I choose to take a more humble approach and just hope it turns out for the best.  I am not amazing.  I am not terrific.  But I do enjoy it and absolutely love it when others enjoy my creations too.  GAWD – I’m so full of shit today!!!!!  I love to cook and think I’m pretty good most of the time.  I admit however to undertaking projects that eventually drive me insane and to creating recipes that we’ll call “undesirable” to say the least!  This week just happens to be one of those weeks. 

While I don’t intend to go on and on and on about the situation in my blog today, I did want you, Reader, to know that I am under added stress and pressure therefore reacting a bit oddly to otherwise normal situations.  This is what leads up to a moment I call “Stomping Stalker”. 

So today I am walking back to work from a somewhat tense lunch.  Immediately after I hug my friends goodbye I turn and start walking towards my office.  I am just a few steps away when I begin hearing a rather loud stomping fall in behind me.  Odd, I think.  What an annoying walk this person has.  I continue walking, picking up my pace a bit to see if I can leave “stomper” behind.  Oh no – stomper decides that he/she will pick up her pace also.  Weird – I think stomper wants to follow me.  Quickly I think about my options.  I stop short and cross the street before it’s necessary just to get away from the mystery stomper behind me.  I smile as I cannot hear stomping behind me.  RELIEF!  Ha!  Whatever!  Suddenly there is a “trotting stomp” behind me.  CRAP!  I continue walking – imagining that this stomping person has to be 7 feet tall – is probably very scary looking, and not someone I particularly want to walk down the street with.  WHY is stomping person following me?  I stop when I could have crossed the street at the corner thinking Stomping Person will go around me and cross – mind you, no traffic is coming.  Oh No…not at all.  Stomping person stops behind me.  I try to look out of the corner of my eye to see if I can catch a glimpse but see nothing.  This is the moment that I decide to call this being “Stomping Stalker”.  The “Walk” sign changes and I begin walking again.  So does SS.  Clunk Clunk Clunk Clunk Clunk – good grief!  My heart starts beating a little fast because I’m positive that SS is following me for a reason.  I’m about to be mugged in broad daylight..  I tighten my grip on my purse.  Do I know this person?  Is it someone that I passed on the street earlier and gave a dirty look too?  I promise Reader my dirty looks aren’t on purpose – they’re actual involuntary responses that come across my face when the thoughts in my head are not nice. --- totally unavoidable.   

Just as panic is about to seize me I see my building up ahead.  Relief replaces the panic and I make a beeline for the door.   Ahhhhhhh – I grab the handle and push – I’m SAFE!!!!  Wait….WTH????  I’m heading towards the elevator and SS is in my lobby!!!!!   Calmly I reach the elevators and there are other people there.  I cross to the far side and slowly turn around to face my stalker.  DO WHAT??????????  The only thing I see is this petite woman with ridiculously large RED clunky high heel booties on that look absolutely out of place on her and totally clash with the outfit she’s wearing!  This is SS?  The elevator door opens and I, along with two others and SS get in.  Sure enough – she clunked right on.  I press 12 and so does she – SERIOUSLY?  The others get off on 7.  I’m alone with the SS.  She is completely involved with her blackberry the way I am completely involved with her ugly red shoes.  We reach the 12^th floor – she walks to the left and clunks into the law office and I walk quietly to Advent wondering how in the world I was near hysteria over a skinny bitch with ugly shoes. 

Ahhhhh – maybe I am feeling a little stressed over project I have decided to undertake for the weekend!!!